traveling alone with two kids

I am exhausted.  It has been a bit more than 24 hours since returning home from a two week, 2,498 mile, three state road trip with a 1.5 year old and a 4 year old.  I have not had a moments rest since landing back in Jackson.  Did I mention that I did this trip alone?  Yep, just me and the two kids.

Friends told me I was crazy but I really wanted to take the kids to my home town to visit family.  Flying was too expensive so driving seemed the best solution, plus it is summer and aren't we supposed to spend days in the car for our summer vacation?  That is how I spent my childhood and I have fond (and funny) memories of those trips.  I planned, boy did I plan.  I tried to think of every and anything that could happen or we would need.  In hindsight I think I did a pretty good job but probably overdid it in the toy department.  My original plan was to drive from Jackson Hole to Des Moines in two days - nine hours each day.  A couple of days prior to leaving I realized that, although it is a realistic goal, I should have an alternative plan in case of mishaps.  I decided to tack on an additional 1.5 hours to each days adventure for potty breaks, lunch and road construction.  This proved to be right on target that tacked on an additional half day onto our journey.

Here is my list of how I survived:

• Hit a discount store (such as the Dollar Store) before you leave.  Pick up stickers, toys, pipe cleaners, etc for surprise activities while driving.  Keep these in a bag in the front seat pulling them out when the kids need a new distraction.
• A friend recommended a dry erase board with tracing alphabet, numbers and shapes for my four year old.  This was a life saver!  G loved it.  (found it at Staples)
• DVD player and videos - I like the Scholastic series as it appeals to kids of various ages.  We have all our favorite stories including Harold and the Purple Crayon, Knuffle Bunny, The Snowy Day, Where the Wild Things Are, Good Night Gorilla and Pete's A Pizza.  Each video lasts one hour with five or more animated stories each.
• For sanity sake I loaded a bunch of new songs on my I-shuffle and put a plug in one ear.  This allowed me to hear the kids or any emergency issues outside while still enjoying my own music.  It was a wonderful distraction for me while driving across the entire state of Nebraska on I-80. I didn't do this the entire drive but in 1 hour incriments for a break. 
• Snacks - keep them simple.  Each child got a Camelback water bottle for non-spill sipping.  Up front I kept a supply of "squeezy" fruit , pretzels, graham crackers and other simple foods.  A small cooler kept string cheese, fruit salad and a soda (for me!) within arm's reach. 
• Map out your lunch stop and decide on a restaurant before you drive into town.  After 4 hours in the car the last thing I wanted to do is drive around an unknown town looking for a place to eat. 
• Map out two overnight destinations - along with your goal location choose a hotel 1 to 1.5 hours earlier in case you have to end for the night.  
• Always make a lodging reservation before starting your journey.  I choose a property that offers a hot cooked breakfast or, at the least, waffles.  This guarantees the kids are full and happy when we hit the road for another long day of driving.  Most properties offers a cancel policy of 4pm day of arrival with no fee so calling to cancel one property is simple.
• If you need a crib make sure you add that information to your reservation.  I like to call the day of arrival to confirm that one will be available and I pack my own sheets for a crib / pack and play.  I have stayed in hotels that dont offer a sheet or wash them in harsh detergents (which can cause rashes). 
• Have your child choose one favorite stuffed animal to share in the journey.  I also throw in a small blanket for each kid as we are not accustomed to air conditioning and get chilled.  
• G is in a booster chair (with the back attached).  Naps tend to be uncomfortable with his poor head flopping about.  We have a small travel pillow that gets tucked under his seatbelt across his chest close to his head/ear.  He is able to hug it while resting his head.  We didnt have any problems with his naps and didnt have to buy anything special.  
• K is still in diapers but G is not.  For "just in case" situations I threw his small training potty, some plastic grocery bags and wet wipes in the back of the car.  Only once did we have to pull over on the interstate for an emergency potty break but thank goodness we were able!  I lined the potty with the bag and he was able to go "number 2" while I had easy clean up afterwards. Rest stops can be few and far between and I dont always want to take the kids into a gas station for relief.  Candy, pop and junk can be too much of a distraction for them and total frustration for me.
• Umbrella Stroller - wow did this come in handy!  Every stop we made had the 1.5 year old in the stroller.  I was able to help G with the bathroom, allow me to use the restroom as well, carry a tray of food to our table, etc.  The one we have is small and just laid on top of the suitcases.
• Be flexible.  Be willing to let go of your expectations and go with the flow.  Hard as it is for me to do this I managed and found the trip to go so much smoother. 

I am sure I am forgetting some details so will add as they come back to me.  I have to admit that the entire trip did not go smooth.  On our return home we spent the night in North Platte, Nebraska.  I found that going to bed with the kids around 8:30pm allows everyone a good night' sleep.  K woke crying at 9:45pm and did not settle back down until 1:30am.  Remarkably, G slept through this but I was a wreck.  At 3:30am G decided to climb into bed with me, sleeping for one more hour before deciding that he was hungry and wanting to get breakfast. After another hour of begging him to go back to sleep and various threats we all awoke and started our day (at 5:30am!).  I was over tired, over cranky while facing 5 hours of driving.  Red bull, telephone calls to friends, and heavy metal music kept me awake long enough to make it to my in-laws house where I took a 2 hour nap.  

Please add your best travel suggestions with kids as I could use a few new ideas for our next trip in November.  Thanks and welcome back.  I have been MIA for awhile, havent I?

lunch with shamu

If you get to Sea World I highly suggest purchasing one of the dining experiences they offer.  Words cannot describe how fun it was to have lunch with Shamu.  It takes place at the private outdoor pool with at least one (and up to three) of the killer whales enjoying "free time" with the trainers.  We were lucky enough to get table #7 which was right in front of the feeding station.  Grainger was so excited he couldn't sit the entire time, jumping with excitement while shoveling in strawberries and hot dog between squeals of delight.  The lunch was informative as they gave statistics that you normally don't hear during the big performance and they allow the intimate group of diners to get incredible photos.  We were amazed at how close we were allowed to get to the large whales.  The lunch wasn't bad either - the buffet offered something for everyone including all those "beige" colored foods our kids adore.  Fresh fruit and steamed veggies are available so you can fill them up on that if you hit the buffet alone leaving the kids at the table to enjoy the fun.  Don't forget to grab some of the Shamu cookies - large sugar cookies coated in dark chocolate in the shape of killer whales!  YUM!

back home

Hi friends.  We have returned home safe and sound.  San Diego was amazing as the weather was perfect and we enjoyed the city, beach and parks.  This week I will figure out how to get the photos off our new camera (a gift!) and then write about our adventures.  If you are heading to SD anytime soon, I have some great places not to miss!

surprise birthday trip

My husband is turning 40 next week!  For this very special birthday I have been planning a surprise trip since May.  I did really well keeping it a secret until extreme lack-of-sleep overcame me and I let the information slip out last week.  Tomorrow morning the entire family is heading to San Diego for a week of sunshine and fun.  I have planned many extras for the trip but can't write about them just yet in case he is reading this post.  I chose San Diego as it offers warm weather, the zoo, Sea World, Wildlife Safari, Lego Land, and the beach.  More on our trip and the adventures coming soon!

rancho la puerta

Before I met my husband and way before kids I hit a wall.  My job was not working out, I had gained 20 lbs and I felt awful, mentally and physically. My life was not on the right path.  I was single with no dating prospects and I had followed the money trail instead of fulfillment with my job.  One night during this period I awoke at 4:00am with horrible pains in my left side.  I ended up in the emergency room with kidney stones.  My stress levels were at an all time high.  A girlfriend who worked at Rancho La Puerta asked me to come down for a week to visit.  It was late October, the weather was changing to winter and I knew if I didn't get away then I would fall deeper into depression.  I was desperate.  I am forever grateful to my friend for her generosity and compassion that week.  My experience at the Ranch changed my life.  It is a beautiful retreat nestled in mountains and surrounded by flowering bushes, rosemary, and grape vines.  I decided to start each day with a 3.5 mile sunrise hike up Pilgrim Way trail and then, after an organic breakfast, try my hand at a yoga, kick boxing or a T'ai Chi class.  After lunch the temps would rise above 90 degress so with my excercise complete I would spend the afternoon relaxing in the pool or having a treatment in the spa.  After dinner I would slowly make my way back to my cottage stopping to sit in a private corner reflecting on my day.  I didn't think much about my plan once I returned home instead focusing all my energy on healing my spirit.  I cried a lot.  I laughed a lot.  And I regained the strenghth I had lost.  Upon my return home I immediately started looking for a new job.  It took me six months to leave that company and then another six months of "time off" before I settled into my current position.  I attribute my time at the Ranch to waking my soul which allowed me to create my destiny.  I left with a renewed energy that opened my heart and eventually brought my husband into my life.  It may sound like a miracle happened while there but it took me almost a year to move forward and complete the circle.  The Ranch gave me the tools to start my journey.

Rancho La Puerta is a one hour drive from San Diego in a sheltered valley in Tecate, Baja California, Mexico.  Surrounded by rosemary bushes, flowering trees, grape vines and meandering paths, the 3,000 acre Ranch opened in 1940 as the world's first destination spa.  With a sustanable, organic farm they follow a slow food concept creating an all-natural menu that is low in fat, sodium, and refined flour and sugar - while high in energy, fiber, and complex carbohydrates.  They offer fitness, spa, cooking classes, and art classes and are open year 'round.  Between the ocean, mountains and desert the Ranch experiences a mild, Mediterranean climate characterized by cool, moist winters and warm-to-hot, dry summers.  I quote from their website: "We provide space—that which is most lacking in today's life. Space to breathe freely amidst nature. To relax. To renew, reflect and redirect one's longer-living life. To explore the possibilities of changing course in one's life. To that end we often refer to our program as “The Door to the Future...Glorious Wellness” which refers to your future, one strengthened and emboldened by good health and fearless life-long learning, which unleashes the willingness to change…for the better." 

travel tips with toddlers - cars

photo taken on Independence Pass in Aspen, Colorado

We drive everywhere.  You don't have a choice when you live 4.5 hours from the nearest city.  Thank goodness we like to take car trips.  Our honeymoon was spent driving the coast line from the tip of Oregon down to San Francisco and then home.  With kids things get more complicated and the older they get, the more you have to plan.  The baby is easy.  She is content lying in the car seat, watching her brother while playing with various hanging toys.  If we choose not to stop I bottle feed her while my husband drives the car.  Our 3.5 year old is another story.  I am jealous of the families who claim to drive across the country with only music and books.  I am not one of those moms.  I rely on the dvd player for part of the time, music during breaks and a cache of books/toys mixed with a few surprises.  Here are my tips for surviving a long journey:

• borrow or trade with friends.  Trade books, videos, small toys with friends whose kids are similar in age.  The goods are new to your child but you don't have to spend money or buy more toys you don't need.  If you don't have this option hit the consignment shops for used items.
  
• download favorite television shows off the web.  We did this for a long car ride and it worked really well.  They only last 20-25 minutes which allows everyone to take a break to talk, laugh, sing or hit the nearest rest stop for leg stretching and potty time.  Downloads are often under $2.99 per and your child will ask to watch the same one over and over - so there is no need for a collecting lots of episodes.
  
• get headphones for your child.  My little guy started wearing headphones at 1.5 years old.  Whether they are listening to their favorite music or story on cd or watching a dvd; this has saved my sanity.  The adults can have a conversation or listen to their favorite music without competing with the children.  They make inexpensive kid earphones which are sold at many major stores.  I think ours cost less than $10 and has a volume control.
• a mirror to view the backseat.  We got one with a clip so it can be moved around.  This saves the chore of unbuckling yourself from the passenger seat belt to turn around.  You can see if they are in need, asleep or fooling around.  Saves the neck.

Things that never worked for me:

• a bag filled with books, toys, etc.  This is a bit deceiving as we do take a bag with stuff but don't put it in his reach.  Placing a box or bag full of items next to the child has never worked for us.  My boy loves to take everything out of the bag immediately then drop them in the foot well for me to retrieve.  (fun game for him!) Bending backwards to pick up items proved to be unsafe for me (no seat belt) and no fun.  I put the bag of goodies in a place I can reach them easily but can't be thrown all over the vehicle.  A one-toy-at-a-time rule is enforced. 
• car seat desk / caddy.  I bought one and after trying it numerous times have found it to not work well.  This may not be the case for all kids but mine just doesn't like it.  He would rather place items between his legs and have the room to move than the hard surface a caddy offers to color or write.  And his crayons would roll off causing lost items resulting in crying for more "colors". 
• neck pillow.  I got one but he hates it.  I wish I could find a solution for his bobbing neck and head during sleep time but I don't have an answer for this one.  Do you?  

If anyone out there has a great tip for car travel - add it here.  I would love to update this post with more information.