losing my mind

no memory

I had to leave the original entry for this post for all to see.  When writing I tend to have ideas for other stories so I create quite a few "new posts" that I save to return to later.  "no memory" is what I put in the text box with the above title losing my mind.  This was to remind me of what I wanted to write about.  I find that funny, a bit ironic and a little unsettling.  I often feel as if I am losing my mind...really.  If I don't write it down it is gone in a matter of minutes.  For example, every night before bed I take off my jewelry placing it on the bathroom counter then remind myself to put it away.  I wash my face and brush my teeth.  This routine takes less than 5 minutes but I always seem to forget to take the jewelry with me.  In the morning it is still there, near the sink just waiting for someone or something to knock it down the drain.  I have recently lost a diamond earring due to my failure to remember (fake diamond so not too upset).  I think most of this has to do with multi-tasking.  I consider myself a master.  I can talk on the phone, write on the computer and bounce the baby on my knee - all at the same time.  Am I proficient?  Doubtful.  But it doesn't stop me from doing it.

Maybe I am asking too much from myself?  How could I when my office is a mess, there are dirty dishes in the kitchen sink, laundry piles in the hallway and countless emails to answer?  How did life get so busy?  What do I do with all my free time?  Multi-tasking isn't working.  In fact, I think it is making things worse.  Doing too much at once makes each task less thoughtful and a little messy.  I make lists.  They are all over the house.  After I complete a task I check it off the list.  None of the lists have check marks.

I know my inability to keep up with the house is due to two kids, me, a husband and pets.  It is my choice to spend the weekends with my family rather than working on my lists.  I can live with that.  Here is where I get worried...I loose track of appointments, friend's phone calls, birthdays, and more.  I put information into my calendar but I still can't remember a conversation I had with my girlfriends only yesterday.  This makes me feel as if I am losing my mind.  I forget the muffins in the oven.  I forgot that I didn't pull the car into the garage and it is midnight.  I forgot to feed the cats.  I forgot to pick up milk, the dry cleaning, buy diapers.  But most of all, I walk our three flights of stairs hundreds of times a day because I forgot my wallet, I need a blanket for the baby, the phone is downstairs, I left my coat in the office, etc...

I am going to work on this issue.  Not sure how to solve it, but at least I can say I am trying.  Two things that might help?  My ability to forgive myself and relax.  Now if I can only remember to do that.